Do you feel like your life is going no where fast? Do you see others around you and wonder why they are so happy/satisfied/wealthy/positive? Feeling positive can seem like it comes more naturally to some and less to others. It would take a long time to explain all the factors involved in why some people are like they are, but you can start changing the way you think about yourself, others and your outlook on life.
I will show you in 10 steps how to start training your brain to start thinking in a positive way. If you are consistent in changing the way you do things every day, you may find your life completely different in as little time as a month or two.
- Write down something you are thankful for everyday.
Include your friends, family, work ect in your daily journal. If you are in a relationship, write down something you appreciate about the person you are with. Within a short period of time you should start to see your life and the appreciation of it start to go up in a big way!
2. Pick a positive thought
or set of thoughts to dwell on everyday. I made a list of “the captain’s orders which include my big goals and how I see my new self. Some people like Tony Robbins would suggest you write them down every day. I have them on my computer and recited them as well as touch them. There is power in having your senses activated while you dwell on your goals and your new way of thinking.
3. Become aware of your thoughts.
Are the positive in general? Do you need to cut out the Negative News? Many people have an ideal of what they think life should be like but also don’t take any responsibility for it. The Government, church, family or support group you are in are not responsible for making your life better and the lives of others around you better. Negative Nancy only makes people dissatisfied even if they live in the most prosperous country in the world. Positive Paul helps others around him and spends his energy on what he can do and how he can impact the lives of others. Become a positive Paul!
4. Make new friends!
Evaluate the people you spend the most time with. Are they uplifting? Do they care about your success and the success of others are the jealous of others and care mostly about themselves? It is said you are the average of your 5 best friends. Whether you agree with this or not, having positive friends should help you along your way to having a successful mindset. Also, if you are having a not so good day, positive friends are the ones the can help pull you out. When we are sick (physically) or temporarily in the wrong mindset, a friend can help trigger something good in us to get us out of our temporary funk!
5. Give back to your community!
Find ways to be kind to others, volunteer in some way and give money. Just imagine what this world would be like if we all gave to community programs and lived with a help first mentality! We can become the influencers that become happy givers. (Warning: happiness might go to unseen levels! Don’t sabotage this happiness by all of a sudden becoming critical of others that don’t volunteer/give ect)
6. Take responsibility for your actions.
Human nature likes to justify why we are the way we are. Our parents didn’t raise us right. The neighbor’s dog is annoying us. You have a bed memory and forget easily. These are all excuses. While we can’t always control our external environment, we can control how we react to it. If you are late, don’t blame the traffic, your mother, the dog ect. You alone are responsible for your life. If you can’t figure out how to change something, don’t complain about it. Ask others around you (Positive Paul) the best ways to change an outcome and do a little dance when you have changed your behavior!
7. Start listening to audio books or reading on a regular basis.
It is very important to feed our conscious, sub conscious, and unconscious with positive inputs. If you want to learn more about the 3 levels of your mind click here.
8. Get rid of your cool songs with bad lyrics.
What you put in comes out in some way or another. You can control your conscious mind but not your unconscious mind which stores the most information and just sends back what is put in. Focus on songs that cause to dance for joy (not easy but still possible).
9. Don’t dwell on past mistakes.
We can be our worst critic when we do something embarrassing, unproductive or unhelpful to others. The only thing you can do is change the way you do things going forward. So instead of spending the time and energy self sabotaging, set out a new input to make sure you don’t repeat. Only use mistakes as feedback!!
10. Find a positive mentor
This could be #1 but positive mentors may be unlikely to mentor a negative person that hasn’t already taken steps to change themselves. If you are married, I would suggest finding another person of the same sex who has been happily married and lives life with a balance of work/play/family/travel.