We are our own best critics and we are also our own excuse makers. When we do something wrong we can call ourselves unwanted names. But we often make excuses for for our behaviour too—often blaming other people. The first and most important concept to get is that you are responsible for all your own behaviour. Not your stepmother, not your siblings, not your parents. There are plenty of people who have overcome tough situations at home to know this is true. I would like to get you to a place where you can take responsibility for your life and forgive those around you. First, I will look at our assumptions for other people.
Other People’s Problems!
When you encounter another person, try to keep in mind they are doing the best they can with what they believe to be true. Even the most screwed up person is doing their best. I know its hard to believe but its true. That doesn’t mean that they couldn’t be doing better by any means, but it does mean that they are using the tools they have learned at this stage in their lives. The only way for you to have an impact on them is for you to lead them on a good path—one that you have already taken. And it may take a while, so be patient! Modeling success leads to excellence. Remember you are responsible for you and can’t force someone else to make decisions.
Responsibility
Now that you are reading how to achieve success, you are on the right path and have all that’s needed to achieve the desired results. Your subconscious is extremely intelligent and if you keep inputting information from successful people on a daily basis it will be hard not to change. Turn off the negative Nancy’s and input positive thoughts and actions that lead to success. Don’t fall into the trap of believing something without some clear roadmap to success. For example, telling yourself you are smart is great if you back it up with action to improve your memory and processing speed of your brain.
Saying to yourself that you are going to make a million dollars a year won’t do anything unless you back it up with action so you can actually make that much. You are responsible for the thoughts, words and actions you take towards yourself and others. If someone continually annoys you, change the way you think about them and they will not have the same impact on you. Realize how you feel about what someone does to you is on you—not on them. Only you can control your thoughts and actions.
I grew up in a dysfunctional family that did not model success. Complaining about it didn’t get me anywhere. Therapy sessions are great and may be needed for some people. But the most important thing you can do is model what successful people are doing. Learn to control your reactions of what other do to you so that you can be the respected person in the room.